I used to believe the construction of inner peace had to be done entirely on the inside, like stacking bricks in an empty room: be still, breathe, forgive. However, the more I tried, the noisier I became. It was only when I began to look outside that I began to understand the things that I needed.

Now, I am searching for peace in other people. Not because people are perfect, but because people are reflections. If my friend sits and listens without the urge to verbally fix me, the patience of my friend makes me calm. The stranger on the train that lets me go first makes me remember that the world isn’t created with only rough edges. There is peace in every choice of gentleness and there is quiet strength in the noisy world.

I have also seen how assuming the best in others makes my anger go away. The coworker that missed their deadline may have been overwhelmed like I was last month, instead of her being a lazy coworker. Maybe the neighbor that always blares music is not being rude, but is trying to be less lonely. The moment that I stop defining and start thinking, then the tension in my chest goes away.

But I still keep my peace and my boundaries. If I want to see and feel less chaos, then I need to see the quiet in the people around me and keep it safe.

So, instead of fighting, I ask questions. I notice the shaking in someone’s voice. I give the grace I have been searching for.